WCW Monday Nitro (Fantasy)
March 27, 2006
St. Louis, MO
The Kiel Center
*****
We see a graphic appear on the screen. It says, "On Sunday, March 26, 2006 - World Championship Wrestling terminated the contract of Jay Reso aka "Christian Cage" for unprofessional conduct. Reso has been removed from all future World Championship Wrestling Events and is no longer affiliated with WCW in any way, shape or manner!"
The crowd is hushed as WCW comes on the air. The arena is jam-packed and sold-out! A loud chorus of boos as WCW Owner Eric Bischoff comes down to the ring, carrying on his shoulder the WCW World Heavyweight Championship title belt.
Eric gets on the mic. He's got a lot of business to take care of. First of all, the rumors are true! Jay Reso, who the fans know better as "Christian Cage" is no longer associated with World Championship Wrestling. Eric explains that Reso was "double-dipping" and trying to "play boths sides" by working for both WCW and that company up North. Eric says that he gave Reso a choice - us or them... and Reso appeared to come around and wise up. But Eric didn't trust him. He knew that Reso was still working shows for the other guys and so Eric told him at an untelevised event a few days ago that he needs to "do the right thing" in an inpromptu title defense against a major WCW Superstar. Well, Cage not only refused to do the "right thing", but he left the arena before the event. Therefore, Eric had no choice, but to terminate his contract and strip him of the WCW World Championship. In other words - Eric looks directly into the camera - "Christian Cage is FIRED!"
As for the WCW World Championship, Eric has plans for the title. He plans to put it on someone who deservesit! Someone who's earned it!
"Real American" blares out as Hulk Hogan comes down to the ring. Hogan does some posing and takes the mic. "Well, ya know, bruthuh, that only one man in WCW deserves to be the champ - the man who made WCW what it was the first time around and can do it again, bruthuh! The Hulkster is here to claim his title!"
Eric doesn't look happy and there is no smile on his face as he tells Hulk point blank, "No!" As he was saying before he was interupted.. The title will be determined in...
Anothter interuption as sirens blare - here comes "Big Poppa Pump" Scott Steiner to the ring. Steiner tells Hogan to back down before he "rips his plastic hip off" and says that he's there to lay claim to the WCW World Title... for all the freaks!
More interuptions as Scott Hall and Kevin Nash - The Outsiders - work their way to the ring. They both make it very clear that any title match should involve both of them as well.
And here comes Woman. She comes to the ring admist all the "big guys" and goes to Eric in full "flirt mode" and says that he'd better remember that "The Horsemen" are the elite performers in WCW and he should just give the title to them.
Eric is pissed and tells everyone to back off! Here's the deal. Next week, on Nitro, six days before the Slamboree PPV, there will be five "qualifying matches". The winners of those five matches will go on to Slamboree to compete for the WCW World Championship... in the Elimination Chamber. Eric puts over the Chamber - a match that HE created while working up North - and says that it's the most brutal and dangerous match in professional wrestling history. He then tells everyone to "get the hell out of his ring because they already have their bookings for the night" - and he's not playing favorites. Next week, the matches will be drawn at random of ten top WCW stars and it's every man for himself. Now good luck to everyone... because they're going to need it..
(commercial)
We come back and ringside announcers Tony Schiavone, Dutch Mantell and newly rehired Mark Madden are talking about the termination of Christian, the vacant WCW World Championship, and the Elimination Chamber.
We see some brief video from last week as Mike Sanders refers to Harley Race in a promo as a "senile old man"...
We go to David Penzer for the first match...
HARLEY RACE versus "ABOVE AVERAGE" MIKE SANDERS
It's short and sweet as Sanders takes the early advantage on Race, jumping him at the bell and pounding away at the former 8-time World Champion. Race takes a beating for a while then resevses a whip into the corner and catches Sanders with a brutal belly-to-belly suplex. From that point, it's all Race as he takes Sanders to school and gives him a wrestling lesson before finally nailing him with the diving headbutt to get the pin.
Winner: HARLEY RACE
Race gets on the mic after the match. If there's going to be a match to make a new World Champion - Race wants Bischoff and the world to know that he's in. After all, nine-time Champ sounds pretty good to him right now.
We go backstage and see Woman with Sean O'Haire and Charlie Haas making strategy for their match later tonight. Lisa Moretti (Ivory) walks up and calls Woman a "skank whore"... Woman has to be restrained by O'Haire & Haas. Moretti tells Woman that since she wanted so bad to get into the ring last week in Moretti's match against Jackie Gayda, Moretti went to Eric Bischoff and later tonight, it's Moretti versus Woman - one on one in the ring. Woman looks shocked at first, but quickly regains her composure and tells Moretti that's fine - because she's more "Woman" than Moretti can handle. Just be ready to be beaten. Ivory smiles and says, "see ya in the ring, skank"...
(commercial)
We come back again to Schiavone & company at ringside. They go over the matches signed for tonight. Kronik will be defending the World Tag Team Championship titles against the team of Chris Kanyon & Diamond Dallas Page. Also, Scott Hall defends the WCW North American Championship against the challenge of "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson. It's Woman versus Ivory as we just found out. It's a star studded show. Now back to Penzer for the next match...
DISCO INFERNO & JEFF HARDY versus SEAN "X-PAC" WALTMAN & JAKE "THE SNAKE" ROBERTS (with Christy Hemme)
Disco and Jeff are out first and do a little mic work to talk about how sick and despised both Roberts and Waltman are in the back - and to put over how "hot and sexy" they are. Disco starts to dance and here comes Waltman & Roberts, led by the ever-bounceful Christy Hemme. Roberts and X-Pac storm the ring and it's on in an eventful and fast moving brawl. Both sides manage to control the action for a bit and we see lots of double-teaming by all four men. In the end, Jeff misses a swanton from the top when X-Pac manages to roll out of the way. Roberts is in and plants the stunned Hardy with a DDT before fighting Disco to the floor. X-Pac manages to roll on top of Hardy and the referee counts the pin.
Winners: SEAN "X-PAC" WALTMAN & JAKE "THE SNAKE" ROBERTS (with Christy Hemme)
(commercial)
We come back and see "Prime Time" Elix Skipper walking into Eric Bischoff's office. Eric is all smiles as he sees Skipper. He wants to personally thank Skipper one more time for making the "right decision" and staying in WCW instead of wasting his time with "those losers up North"... Skipper says that WCW gave him his first break and he'll always remember that! Anyhow, Eric has a surprise for Skipper. Eric only announced five qualifying matches for the Elimination Chamber match for the next week. There are six slots in the Elimination Chamber. Five men will compete in Qualifying matches to earn their spot. But the first spot will be filled... by "Prime Time". Elix is stunned and all smiles - he's speechless. Eric tells him that it's all about opportunities. He told Skipper that if he stayed with WCW, there would be opportunities to become a superstar. Here's the opportunity - now Skipper just has to make the most of it. Skipper shakes Eric's hand repeatedly and says "Thank you!" Eric goes, "No, thank you!" and smiles as we cut to..
Woman is headed towards the ring. Arn is with her, but she stops him. He has to go get ready to give Scott Hall the beating of a lifetime later tonight. She'll take care of this little thing with "Ivory" all by herself... and show everyone that she's definitely one woman not to be messed with...
(commercial)
We see a video promo for the upcoming WCW Hall of Fame inductions coming up at WCW Slamboree on Sunday, April 9, 2006. The first name to be inducted into the WCW HOF - Class of 2006 will be "The Living Legend" BRUNO SAMMARTINO...
Back to Penzer..
WCW WOMENS CHAMPIONSHIP
LISA "IVORY" MORETTI (c) versus WOMAN
Catfight! Catfight! The two ladies are quickly on the mat, rolling around and trying to gain position. Surprisingly, Woman is the first to gain the advantage with a poke to the eyes and several kicks to the stomach. Suplex by Woman for two. Moretti fights back with punches and kicks and a knee to the gut. Suplex by Ivory for two. Clothesline by Ivory and she slams Woman hard to the mat. Ivory covers, but Jackie Gayda is there and on the apron, distracting the referee. Ivory goes over and grabs Jackie, pulling her into the ring and punching her before tossing her to the floor. Woman swings at Ivory, but Moretti ducks and rolls Woman up into a cradle for the pin.
Winner: LISA "IVORY" MORETTI
We go back to the back where Lenny Lane, Lodi & Rico are planning strategy for their upcoming match against Windham & Cactus Jack. Soce the Elemental Wizard is there, but he's being ignored as he tries to inject an idea. He's noticed Windham having back problems and.... Lodi cuts him off and tells him to "leave the wrestling strategy to the wrestlers. Go write a song or something!" Soce doesn't say anything, but walks off in a huff! He walks out the door, brushing past Kwee Wee who's coming into the room. "What's up with Soce?", Kwee Wee asks his partners. "Who knows?" says Lenny. Lodi adds, "Who cares?"
(commercial)
We see a bit of video from last week as The Rock made his return to professional wrestling and cut an amazing promo. Brock Lesnar interupted and a challenge was made for Slamboree - Brock Lesnar versus The Rock...
Back to Nitro and Brock Lesnar comes to the ring along with Rena Mero by his side. He wants to know where "Mr. Hollywood" is tonight! Probably off making another "straight to video" bomb like "Doom"... Brock is ready for some action and doesn't want to wait until Slamboree. He wants the Rock now! But since Rock isn't there, Brock will take on any "punk jabroni" from the back.
Music hits and here comes "Big Sexy" Kevin Nash... If Brock is itching for a fight, then "Big Sexy" is just the man to give it to him. Brock tells Kevin to "bring it on"... Nash comes to the ring and a referee runs out to ring the bell and it's on...
BROCK LESNAR (with Rena Mero) versus "BIG SEXY" KEVIN NASH
The irresitable force versus the immovable object as two giants collide. Kevin takes the early advantage with a big kick and several elbows in the corner. Brock fights back with a stiff clothesline and several forearm shots. Back and forth it goes. Finally, Kevin seems to have the advantage and has Brock in position for a bog powerbomb, but Brock reverses the move, lifting Kevin up on his shoulders and moving into the F-5. Kevin is dropped and Brock picks up the pin.
Winner: BROCK LESNAR (with Rena Mero)
(commercial)
We see Soce in the back on his cellphone. Rico comes up! Rico was looking for Soce and tells him to not worry about what Lodi said! Soce says "It's cool!" and they go to get ready for action later.
Arn is with Haas & O'Haire. They say what happened to Woman earlier. The Horsemen can't afford to lose again. Haas says that they don't have to worry about it. This match is "money in the bank" for the Horsemen. O'Haire changes the subject to the Elimination Chamber match at Slamboree. He's been the World Champion before and would like to do it again so he's going to put his name in for one of the qualifying matches. Arn says that's fine, but Arn is in there too - and remember that it's everyone for themselves once they get into the chamber. O'Haire says that's fine - as long as the Horsemen have the gold, it's all good!
We go back again to Eric Bischoff's office and Hulk Hogan is there and he's mad! He wants to know what the deal is with the "Elimination Chamber" and "qualifying matches". He's Hulk Hogan! He doesn't need to "qualify for anything!" Eric cuts him off. If Hogan wants to be involved in the title match at Slamboree, he has to qualify! If he doesn't want to do that, he can just go home now and do his little reality tv show and play "stage mom" because Eric doesn't really need to deal with all that ego right now! Hogan gets in Eric's face and says "he'd better step back and watch himself, bruthuh!" Eric smiles and tells Hulk to calm down. It's all about fairness and opportunity. Eric tells Hogan that "I've got your back"... Hulk will still have to wrestle in the qualifying match to get to the Elimination Chamber, but Eric will find a "jabroni" for him to wrestle, so it'll be an easy payday for the Hulkster. Hulk seems a little appeased, but warns Eric that he'd better be playing straight... or else. Eric smiles and tells Hulk to "trust me!" as we go to commercial...
(commercial)
Another video promo airs introducing the next person that will be inducted into the WCW Hall of Fame Class of 2006... former AWA Womens Champion and a true wrestling pioneer and legend, PENNY BANNER...
Back to Penzer for the next match...
LENNY LANE & LODI - THE WEST HOLLYWOOD BLONDES (with Rico, Soce & Kwee Wee) - THE RAINBOW COALITION versus
CACTUS JACK & BARRY WINDHAM
Brutal action from the get-go as the Blondes and Jack/Windham brawl and pound away at each other. It goes back and forth and we see both Kwee Wee and Rico manage to get shots in from the outside. Cactus Jack uses the running clothesline to take Lodi to the floor. Windham has Lenny up for a suplex, but Lenny manages to shift his weight and counter, getting Windham up for the suplex instead. Soce reaches in and pulls out the leg from under Lenny, causing Windham to fall on top of Lenny. Windham puts a foot on the ropes and gets the pin.
Winners: BARRY WINDHAM & CACTUS JACK
As the referee raises the arms of Windham & Cactus, we see the Rainbow Coalition gather around Soce on the outside and point accusing fingers at him for costing them the match. Soce tries to explain his side, but no one will listen. We see the Coalition go up the ramp and to the back, arguing all the way as we go to commercial..
(commercial)
A video promo airs for "Slamboree - A Legends Reunion" - coming up on April 9, 2006... Matches signed so far are:
BROCK LESNAR versus THE ROCK
THE ELIMINATION CHAMBER: 6 WCW Superstars battle it out to become the new WCW World Champion. Already entered: Elix Skipper...
Back to Nitro and we go to the back where Lodi and Lenny are still teraing into Soce about his mistake in the match a few minutes ago. Finally, Soce snaps. He's sick of them berating him and looking down on him because he's "not a wrestler"... He's one of the top music acts in New York today and has millions of fans. He has three cd's out, available at http://www.socetew.com/... and he deserves respect! Lodi says that if Soce want's respect, earn it! Next week on Nitro, it's Lodi versus Soce... Soce looks shocked! And Lodi says that even though he knows Soce is used to "wrestling big men", he'd better be ready for something he's never experienced before - a lesson in pain and agony! Soce is speechless as The Blondes walk off. But then, we see a small smile form on Soce's face as he watches the Blondes leave...
We see Jimmy Valiant, the "Boogie Woogie Man" in the back. He's giving a last second pep talk to Juventud Guerrera & Evan Karagias. They' re up against the Horsemen.. and they're next!
(commercial)
We go backstage where Terri Runnels is standing by with the WCW World Tag Team Champions, Brian Adams & Bryan Clark - KRONIK. Tonight, they defend the titles against Dallas Page and Kanyon. Kronik put over DDP & Kanyon as being a good team and tough guys, but they're not Kronik! They're not the champs! And tonight, just like every other night, Page & Kanyon will learn first hand why "it's all about Kronik!"
We see another video promo for the WCW Hall of Fame Induction Ceremonies coming up on April 9, 2006 at Slamboree. The next inductee to the Class of 2006 will be... BARON VON RASCHKE....
Now to David Penzer...
CHARLIE HAAS & SEAN O'HAIRE (with Miss Jackie) - THE HORSEMEN versus JUVENTUD GUERRERA & EVAN KARAGIAS (with Jimmy Valiant)
A pretty good match as Karagias and Juvi came ready to fight and take the early advantage with quick tags and high-flying moves. But eventually, the experience and teamwork of the Horsemen proves too much and we see Haas use the "Haas of Pain" to put Karagias away for the pin.
Winners: CHARLIE HAAS & SEAN O'HAIRE - THE HORSEMEN
(commercial)
We come back and see Terri Runnels with "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson. Arn is in rare form as he talks about wrestling Scott Hall tonight to take back "his title"... Arn then goes on to talk about "The Horsemen" and what the future holds. A group like the Horsemen is in a constant state of evolution and working to be better and stronger. Losing a member, especially a founding member, to interpromotional politics was a hard blow, but his best friend did what he had to do. And so will Arn. He's got his eyes on a few guys who might just have what it takes to be one of the elite. Terri asks him to name names, but Arn tells Terri and the world that they'll have to wait and see. But they can be assured of one thing - the Horsemen will continue to dominate and control the sport of professional wrestling.... just like always! And that is somethng you can count on...
We go now to David Penzer..
WCW WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
BRIAN ADAMS & BRYAN CLARK - KRONIK (c) versus DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE & KANYON
A brutally stiff match that started off with a handshake as a sign of mutual respect and ended up in fists flying and chop-suey city as the four men try to beat the crap out of each other. In the end, Kanyon falls victim to some "hard times" and goes down as Clark covers to get the pin.
Winners and still champions: KRONIK
(commercials)
Another promo airs for the WCW Hall of Fame Inductions - taking place at Slamboree - A Legends Reunion on April 9, 2006... The fourth member of the WCW HOF Class of 2006 will be legendary masked grappler MIL MASCARAS..
Back to Schiavone & friends who plug the HOF Inductions and talk about how four more legends will be announced next week. Also next week, it's Soce the Elemental Wizard versus Lodi. Plus five big qualifying matches for a spot in the Elimination Chamber at Slamboree - A Legends Reunion on Arpil 9, 2006. Plus, they've just received word that at Slamboree, Lisa Moretti will be defending the WCW Womens Championship in a triple-threat match against Woman and Miss Jackie. Plus Schiavone has just received a memo from Eric Bischoff that from now on, the WCW North American Championship - currently held by Scott Hall, will be known as the "WCW World Television Championship".... So now, Hall is the WCW TV Champion instead of the North American Champion. And now to David Penzer to announce the participants for the next match for the WCW World Television Championship.
WCW WORLD TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
SCOTT HALL (c) versus ARN ANDERSON (with Woman)
SCOTT HALL (c) versus ARN ANDERSON (with Woman)
Arn and Hall start off slowly, trying to feel the other out and look for an opening. Arn responds first and nails into Hall with some stiff lefts. Hall fights back with chops, kicks, and a huge fallaway slam that shakes the ring and makes the crowd "oooooh!" in amazement. Arn kicks out before being pinned and fights back, pulling Hall into the corner and pounding away at him. Spinebuster by Double-A and he gets two as Scott manages to get a foot on the ropes. In the end, Arn goes for an inside cradle, but Scott manages to shift the weight and hold on for the pin.
Winner and still Champion: SCOTT HALL
As the referee raises Hall's arm in victory, we see a figure coming through the crowd and into the ring from behind. It's JEFF JARRETT with a guitar and he lays out Hall from behind! Jarrett then goes after Arn Anderson and catches him with "the stroke", laying out Double-A as well. With Hall and Anderson both down, Jarrett gets the mic - "Listen up, Slapnuts!" He's here to be the king of the mountain. He's here to be the WCW World Champion and no one is going to stop him. The crowd erupts as we see Kevin Nash come down the rampway to the ring. Here comes Charlie Haas & Sean O'Haire too - the Horsemen. Jarrett flees to the arena floor and back up through the crowd as Nash checks on Hall and the Horsemen check on Arn. In the crowd, we see Jarrett make the symbol for a title belt around his waist and raise the remains of his broken guitar as we fade to black...
THE END...
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