WCW Monday Nitro
The Recap
May 15, 2006
Boston, MA
Fleet Center
We open up the show with Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden & Dutch Mantell welcoming us to WCW Monday Nitro. We'e WCW - we're live and we wrestle. Big news for tonight. In the cage, WCW World Champion Jeff Jarrett is defending the title against the challenge of former Champion Sean O'Haire. Luna Vachon will also be here later tonight - she wants to "apologize" to Brock Lesnar and Sable for injuring Sable a few weeks ago prior to Spring Stampede. Plus so much more.
Music hits and the crowd erupts in boos as WCW Executive Director Cyrus make his way to the ring. Cyrus doesn't look much happy. Cyrus announces that later tonight, he and the boss, Eric Bischoff will be meeting none other that Sean "X-Pac" Waltman right here in the middle of the ring. Waltman wants to air dirty laundry in public and says he can't get Bischoff to talk to him. Well, Eric has ordered Waltman to be here tonight. And at the top of the hour, they're going to discuss all the "slanderous lies" that Waltman has been spreading on the internet about his suspension from WCW.
We hear the sounds of "HATAH" (available on "The Lemonade Incident" CD - at www.myspace/soce) as Soce the Elemental Wizard, followed closely by the WCW World Tag Team Champions Hugh Morrus and Tank Abbott, as well as Rico, make their way towards the ring. Soce is looking around and a nervous, jumpy basket case as he confronts Cyrus. Cyrus and Bischoff have to do something about Bill Goldberg. He's been stalking Soce and popping up everywhere and just glaring at him, saying those two words, "You're Next!". Cyrus doesn't look amused and wants to know what the hell Soce is talking about. Soce is almost beside himself as he tells the producers to roll the footage he gave them.
We see Soce on stage performing his set. Soce explains that this was this past Thursday in Soho at the Legitimate Theater Company in NYC. As Soce finishes up and thanks the crowd, we watch the tape and see him move off the stage to the side. A huge figure is there in the shadows, and we're barely able to make out who it is. It's Goldberg. We see Goldberg say something to Soce and watch Soce scamper away quickly from the imposing figure.
We're back to Nitro and Soce is demanding that Cyrus "fire" Goldberg. He's insane. He's a stalker! Cyrus just gets a little smirk on his face as he tells Soce to calm down. Didn't Soce interfere in Goldberg's match with the Rock at Spring Stampede, costing him the match? "Yeah, but...." Soce tries to explain, but Cyrus cuts him off. "It looks like you might have a problem then because, from what I can see... you're next!" As Soce tries to argue and complain, Cyrus leaves the ring and starts walking to the back. He's surrounded by The Elementalz, but he isn't paying them any attention as we go backstage to where Bob Caudle is standing by with Lenny & Lodi - The West Hollywood Blondes.
Lenny & Lodi are both in rare form as they're full of wise cracks and lots of innuendo laced comments. Tonight, they're facing the "Heart Throbs" and someone is "going down". Lenny and Lodi are the hottest, the flashiest, the sexiest, and the most exciting tag team in WCW. And no posers and wanna-be glamor boys are taking their spot. They close the segment up by offering to take Bob Caudle out to make him a "ladies man"... Then Lenny offers Bob a "blow pop".
(commercial)
We see footage of the past few weeks and tensions building between Jeff Hardy and WCW Newcomer Kirby Mack aka "Your New Addiction Krazy-K" and Buff Bagwell, including a match last week with Buff taking on Hardy with Krazy-K as the guest referee. Schiavone informs us that Bagwell challenged Hardy & Kirby to a tag team match tonight. No one knows who Buff's partner will be, but Jeff & Kirby did accept the challenge.
We go to David Penzer for the introductions...
"KRAZY-K" KIRBY MACK & JEFF HARDY versus BUFF BAGWELL & "BIG POPPA PUMP" SCOTT STEINER
Buff's partner is none other than the "Big Bad Booty Daddy" Scott Steiner. If Kirby & Hardy are upset at this revelation, they don't show it. Steiner and Hardy start off and Steiner just pounds away at Jeff with clubbing blows and several suplexes. Buff tags in and keeps up the damage, but gets distracted by the desire to pose and gives Hardy a chance to tag in Kirby. Kirby with dropkicks and armdrags on Buff. Steiner comes in and gets a dropkick to the kisser as well. It all breaks down though as all four men get into the ring and we have total chaos. A clothesline by Steiner sends Jeff to the floor. Scott follows and tries to toss Jeff into the steps, but Jeff reverses and Scott eats metal. We see Jeff do the "running along the fan barrier" thingee and hit Scott with a flip on to the hard concrete floor. In the ring, Buff seems to have matters well in hand and sets up Kirby for a suplex. Kirby tucks in and rolls Buff up in a cradle. The referee counts and hits the three count.
Winners: JEFF HARDY & "YOUR NEW ADDICTION KRAZY-K" KIRBY MACK
(commercial)
We come back and it's back to David Penzer for the next match.
ANTONIO & ROMEO - THE HEART THROBS versus LENNY & LODI - THE WEST HOLLYWOOD BLONDES
We see lots of glitter, flash and strutting in the beginning, but not much wrestling as the two teams seem more determined to "out-flash" the others than to beat them. Finally, as Romeo and Antonio are doing a double strut with the boas in the middle of the ring, we see Lenny look at Lodi and they quickly move in and both give Romeo and Antonio quick pinches on the ass. Romeo and Antonio are shocked and quickly scamper to the floor as Lenny & Lodi milk the appreciation of the fans at ringside. Romeo and Antonio get back in the ring and tell the Blondes that if they think they can strut better, prove it. Lenny & Lodi strut. Romeo & Antonio move in and quickly pinch The Blondes on the ass, but rather than be upset, Lenny and Lodi seem to like it. They want more. Romeo & Antonio are freaking out and complaing to the referee and anyone who will listen. We see Lodi and Lenny look at each other again and quickly move as Lodi nails Romeo with a clothesline. We see Lenny wrap up Antonio in a very unusual cradle position and the referee drops down and counts three.
Winners: LENNY & LODI - THE WEST HOLLYWOOD BLONDES
We see a video promo - coming on May 24th from Atlanta, GA - it's the return of "The Clash of Champions"...
(commercial)
We come back and Missy Hyatt is backstage with the WCW Womens Champion, April Hunter. April is proud to be the new Womens Champion after beating Ivory last week. She's in such a good mood, she's going to give someone a title shot tonight. Missy asks who? April just smiles and says, "You! That's who. See you in the ring!" before walking off. We see Missy smile as she realizes the opportunity she's being given.
Back to the ring and David Penzer...
WCW WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
TANK ABBOTT & HUGH MORRUS - THE ELEMENTALS (c) - with Soce the Elemental Wizard & Rico versus
"PRIMETIME" ELIX SKIPPER & "THE BLACK NATURE BOY" SCOOT ANDREWS - with Jimmy "The Boogie Woogie Man" Valiant.
Valiant is wearng a "Goldberg" mask as he comes out with his of Skipper & Andrews. Soce isn't happy about this and complains to Rico at ringside. Hugh starts off with Skipper and just pounds away at the smaller man with clubbing blows to the back and neck. Skipper fights back with an enzaguri before tagging in Andrews. Scoot with dropkicks on Morrus. He hits two, but goes up one time too many for a third and Morrus swats him away. Abbott is in with fists and kicks. Slam and cover for two as Skipper breaks it up. Skipper tags in and uses his speed to confuse Tank as he employs a hit-and-run strategy. Rico gets up on the apron to provide a distraction, but he's pulled down and nailed with a punch by Jimmy Valiant. But the distraction serves it's purpose as Tank manages to slam Skipper to the mat with a powerbomb. Hugh tags in and hits "No Laughing Matter" to get the pin for his team.
Winners & still champions: TANK ABBOTT & HUGH MORRUS (with Soce & Rico)
As the four men celebrate their victory, from out of the crowd comes Goldberg. He runs into the ring and quickly spears Hugh Morrus. He grabs Tank Abbott and nails him with a jackhammer. Rico & Soce have fled to the floor and up the ramp. Goldberg gets on the mic. "Hey Soce... you're next!" Goldberg grins as we go to commercial.
(commercial)
A video pomo airs - coming on June 11, 2006 - it's the next big WCW PPV - "Bash At The Beach"....
We see WCW World Champion Jeff Jarrett backstage with Bob Caudle. Jarrett is not happy. Tonight, he has to wrestle Sean O'Haire. And in less than two weeks at the Clash of the Champions, he has to then defend his title against Harley Race.. in a steel cage. It's a conspiracy and a scandal. He's the man with all the stroke - he's the "chosen one" and everyone is out to get him. But he's also the Champion and they can just "choke on that, slapnuts!". Caudle asks him what will happen if Sean O'Haire manages to beat him for the title tonight. It could happen. Jarrett just glares at Bob Caudle for a moment and then crashes his ever-present guitar down across the head of the elderly announcer. As Caudle goes down, Jarrett just watches him and walks off. Officials and medics quickly move in to help Caudle as we go to commercial.
(commercial)
We go to the announcers at ringside. Schiavone is hot at what Jarrett just did to Bob Caudle and calls Jarrett a cowardly piece of garbage. He hopes O'Haire takes the title and beats his ass. Madden & Mantell tell Schiavone to calm down and plug the sponsers for tonight's edition of WCW Nitro - http://www.plasteredpanda.com/, http://www.greathiphop.com/, and "See No Evil" - coming to theatres on May 19th...
We go to Penzer for the next match..
WCW WOMENS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
APRIL HUNTER (c) versus MISSY HYATT
It's short, but brutal as both women quickly lock up and begin tossing each other across the ring by the hair and other body parts. Missy manages to get the advantage after April misses a clothesline and scores with one of her own. April fights back though and sends Missy crashing into the corner. Neckbreaker and pin as April captures the win and retains her title.
Winner: APRIL HUNTER
As April gets her arm raised in victory, we see the former Womens Champion, Lisa "Ivory" Moretti, walk out on the rampway. She applaudes April for her victory and gets the mic. That was a great match for April. She's a tough lady. But she has something that Ivory wants. She had the belt for a long time and liked being the champion. And she has a rematch clause. So at the Clash of the Champions, it's going to be April Hunter defending the Womens Championship against Ivory. April kind of nods like that's OK with her and Ivory just smiles as she says "See you at the Clash!"
We go backstage and see Luna Vachon, dressed conservatively in a long dress, with little make-up and looking more like a choir girl than the deranged lunatic we all know she is. She's pacing nervously. Her "apology" to Brock Lesnar and Sable is next....
(commercial)
We go back two weeks ago to Nitro and see video of Luna attacking her "partner" Sable with a chair after clipping her leg in a sneak attack. Luna pounds away at the leg and ankle of Sable until she's finally chased from the ring by officials and Brock Lesnar.
Here comes Luna Vachon. She's quiet and soft-spoken in her matronly outfit as she asks for Brock Lesnar and Sable to please come to the ring. Brock's music hits and we see Brock and Sable (on crutches) come out of the back and head towards the ring. Brock immediately goes after Luna who quickly bails to the floor and hides behind the announcers at ringside. Brock glares at her as he helps Sable climb into the ring. Luna is on the mic, pleading for Brock and Sable to just listen to her. She's sorry. She didn't mean to hurt Sable. Sable whispers something to Brock and he steps back and allows Luna to get back into the ring. Luna is trying to apologize to Sable and Brock and plead her case, but Sable cuts her off. She always knew that Luna was a "piece of trash" and couldn't be trusted. But she has news for Luna. Sable tosses the crutch aside. Her ankle isn't broken - it was just a sprain. And she's been cleared to wrestle again. And she knows that Brock is wrestling Luna and a partner at the Clash. Well, it's a tag match now because Sable is back and is going to kick Luna's ass. But why wait until the Clash. Sable is ready to kick Luna's ass rght now. Luna is backing up and backs right into Brock. She's trapped. Luna drops to her knees and pleads to Brock and Sable for mercy to no avail. Suddenly, someone hits the ring - it's Vampiro. He nails Brock from behind and catche shim with a quick "Nail In The Coffin". Sable is distracted and Luna catches her with an uppercut. We see Luna & Vampiro work over Brock and Sable and leave the two laid out in the ring. Luna & Vampiro embrace and leave the ring as referees come in and tend to Brock and Sable.
(commercial)
"Above Average" Mike Sanders is in the ring. He's on a rant about the "so-called legends of WCW". He hates the old-timers and how they leave their teeth in jars around the dressng room. They smell like they forgot to change their Depends. Muisic hits and we see "The Con-Man" Rob Conway come out to the ring. He's back in the mesh tights and the top hat. Rob agrees with everything that Sanders is saying. Conway mentions that he's a bit of a "Legend Killer' himself and when he was up north, he used to regulary amuse himself by beating up the senior citizens in the locker rooms. He thought it was bad there, but "Wheel Chair Wrestling" has more dinosaurs than Jurassic Park ever hoped for. Conway suggests that he and Sanders team up and help speed up Father Time by "wiping out the dinosuars".
Music hits and we see "Hardcore Legend" Cactus Jack & "Middle Aged & Crazy" Terry Funk come out to the ramp. If Sanders and Conway are looking for a couple of old-timers to beat up, they just found their huckleberrys. Cactus says he isn't old, "but Funk is" and he's going to kick Terry's ass at the Clash. But for now, they're together and they ought to kick someone else's ass, unless of course, the two "pretty boys" in the ring don't have the testicular fortitude to back up their comments. Sanders and Conway don't look too happy at this challenge to their manhood and tell Cactus & Funk to "bring it"... Funk and Cactus charge the ring and we have a match.
MIKE SANDERS & ROB CONWAY versus CACTUS JACK & TERRY FUNK
Sanders & Conway team up at the start to take the advantage over Terry Funk, working on the leg of the former NWA/ECW Champion. Funk fights back by ripping at the eyes and chopping away at the chest of Conway. Clotheslines by Funk and Cactus is in with punches and a suplex. Conway is tied to the Tree of Woe and gets hit by the bg elbow of Cactus. Sanders breaks it up before Cactus can get the pin. All four men end up in the ring brawling and we see Sanders get send to the floor by the running clothesline by Cactus. Funk moves in on Conway and clips the knee before locking in a spinning toe hold. Sanders can't get it to break it up since he's busy fighting with Cactus on the outside. Conway tries to resist, but finally ends up tapping out.
Winners: CACTUS JACK & TERRY FUNK
We go backstage and see Christy Hemme wth Alex Wrght. He doesn't need to do this match against Colt. Why can't they all be friends? Alex calls Colt Cabana a "grinning moron" and says that Christy needs to quit wasting her time hanging out with losers. "Like you used ot hang out with Disco all the time?", Christy replies. Alex stops and glares at Christy. That's different. Me & Disco were champions. Cabana will never be anything more than a grinning monkey. "But!", Hemme tries to inject, but Alex cuts her off. "Tell you what! I don't need you at ringside tonight! Stay here in the back!" Hemme tries to object, but Alex walks off.... Alex Wright versus Colt Cabana is next...
(commercial)
We go to Penzer who introduces the next match.
ALEX WRIGHT versus COLT CABANA
Before the bell can ring, Colt gets the mic. Last week, they wrestled and both ended up getting counted out. Why not make tonight's match a "Falls Count Anywhere" match. Wright nods in agreement and the ref calls for the bell. Both men lock up and after a few seconds of wrestling holds and reversals, we see the brawling begin. Fists and kicks are exchanged as Wright and Colt go out in the crowd and generally just beat the crap out each other. They head up towards the top of the arena and we see Colt plaster Alex with a sick facebuster on the concrete floor. Colt goes to cover, but here is Disco Inferno out. He has a bag with somethng in it and his duck. He whomps Colt from behind with the duck and Colt goes down. Disco pulls Alex over on top of Colt and yells at the referee to count. The ref counts 3.
Winner: ALEX WRIGHT
Disco helps Alex up and goes digging into the bag he brought with him. He pulls out a monkey suit and start to put the stunned Colt into the suit, but they only get so far as the head before Colt is swinging and fighting them off. Disco and Alex flee as Colt realizes that Disco and Alex made a monkey out of him (literally) and rips off the monkey mask while cursing and mumbling at the camera.
(commercial)
Back in the dressing rooms, we see Soce hollering at his wrestlers to hurry up and get ready so they can leave. He's jittery and nervous and ready to get out of the arena before Goldberg come after him again. "Soce", a voice calls out and we see Scoe nearly jump out of his skin. It's Juventud Guerrera. He's been watching and has a solution for Soce's problem with Goldberg... a bodyguard. Soce looks interested, so Juvi continues. He's even found Soce the perfect bodyguard - someone who has experience dealing with Goldberg. Soce is perking up now and wants to know who Juvi has found. Juvi tells Soce to wait there and steps outside the locker room for a second. He's back and he tells the bodyguard to come on in. We see Soce's mouth drop open as the camera reveals Juvi's "bodyguard" for Soce. It's Ralphus! Ralphus is standing there grinning with no teeth and his belly hanging out. "So, what do you think?", says a grinning Juvi. Soce is speechless. Hugh Morrus and Tank Abbott come out and chase Juvi and Ralphus off as Rico consoles Soce. We hear Juvi holler as he's going out the door, "You're next Soce... you're next!!..... ha ha ha ha!" Soce just looks at Rico with a worried look on his face and sighs loudly..
We go to Terri Runnels who is standing by with Mike Youngblood. Mike is holding in his hands a long leather strap. He talks about how much that leather hurts when it's whipping against sweaty flesh. Terri mentions that she likes the feel of leather on sweaty flesh. Mike looks at her and grins, "We'll talk later!" At the Clash of Champions, Eric Bischoff has signed an Indian Strap Match with Youngblood taking on his former partner, Ethan Storm. Mike puts over how he's known Storm since they were in school together and Storm was always a bit of a spoiled brat. He always needed a good spanking. And at the Clash, he's going to get a strapping he'll remember for the rest of his life.
We go to David Penzer who introduces The Horsemen - Arn Anderson, Charlie Haas, Woman & C.W. Anderson who come to the ring. They put over how Sean O'Haire is going to bring the World Championship back to the Horseman family later tonight when he faces Jarrett. Arn calls Jarrett a "coward" for his assault on announcer Bob Caudle earlier and says that if Jarrett wants to attack someone, why not someone who can fight back. Arn says that this week, O'Haire takes Jarrett's belt - and next week, Arn will take Jarrett's pride. Haas is next to speak. Miss Jackie is off right now shopping for baby clothes and toys for their child. And he can't wait until the baby is born and he can sit down and rock the baby and tell him stories about how his daddy and Uncle Arn and Uncle C.W. kicked the crap out of Kevin Nash, Scott Hall & Marty Jannetty. C.W. gets the mic and just says that tonight, it's all about the Horsemen - and there is nothing that Hall, Nash, Jannetty or anyone else can do about it.
We go to commercial as the Horsemen get ready for their match..
(commercial)
ARN ANDERSON, C.W. ANDERSON & CHARLIE HAAS - THE HORSEMEN (with Woman)
versus
SCOTT HALL, KEVIN NASH & MARTY JANNETTY
Lots of action as both teams are fired up and ready to go all night. The Horsemen control for a while when the Andersons double-team Jannetty. Nash breaks that up and uses his strength and size advantage to work over Arn in the corner. Arn tags in Haas, who tries to take Nash off his feet with some mat wrestling, but Kevin powers free and uses the boot to choke Charlie in the corner. Hall is in with chops and gives Haas a fallaway slam. Arn breaks up the pin attempt and hits Scott with a DDT. Nash uses a clothesline to put Arn down and picks up Haas for the powerbomb. C.W. clips the leg of Nash and saves Haas. C.W. with kicks at the leg of the fallen 7-footer. Jannetty scores on Anderson with a dropkick from behind. Woman tries to distract the referee, but she's brought into the ring by Hall who bends her over his knee and starts to give her a spanking. It all breaks loose as all six men end up in the ring as The Anderson's go after Hall and allow Woman to escape to the floor. We see Haas use a cradle to roll up Jannetty, but Scott pushes them and rolls Jannetty over on top of Haas. The referee counts three.
Winners: SCOTT HALL, KEVIN NASH & MARTY JANNETTY
We cut to the back and see Eric Bischoff and Cyrus. They're on their way to the ring.
(commercial)
We come back and Eric Bischoff and Cyrus are already in the ring. Eric has the mic. "Sean Waltman, X-Pac, whatever - I know you're here, so get out here now!" Here comes Waltman to the ring. Eric tells the sound guys to shut the music off. Only WCW superstars get music. Waltman comes out and comes to the ring. Eric is upset and wants to know why Waltman went running to some no-talent internet hack to make their dirty laundry public. Waltman wants to know why he was suspended indefinitely. Eric says that he's the boss and suspends who he wants to for whatever reason he wants to. Waltman calls Eric a "sorry S.O.B." and says that he spends too much time with his head up everyones asses and doesn't have a clue. Back and forth slamming by Bischoff & Waltman. Finally, Cyrus steps in. "You want to know why you were suspended, Waltman? Because I asked Eric to. The whole 'giving secrets to Vince' thing was a ruse. You're a two-bit punk with no sense of responsibility, no talent, a drug user, a porn freak. You only have a job now because Hall & Nash keep sticking up for you. Why? So you can keep fetching their slippers and picking up their drycleaning like a good little lapdog! You make me sick, Sean! Always getting the second chances. And third chances. You don't belong in WCW. You belong in the gutter somewhere. Because that's all you are is trash! Pure and simple! Trash!"
Waltman takes a moment to take all this in and we see a little smile on his face as he quickly nails Cyrus with a big kick to the chops. Waltman stands over Cyrus and does the DX-style crotch chop in Cyrus's face. Eric has security quickly come in and get between Waltman and Cyrus as he tells everyone to hold on. That's not right. He didn't suspend Waltman because of what Cyrus said. Eric did it because he wanted to. He hates X-Pac and everything he represents. He only keeps X-Pac around because it makes Hall & Nash happy. And it's because of the respect he has for Hall & Nash that he's going to give X-Pac another chance to earn his spot on the WCW roster. At the Clash of the Champions, X-Pac is going to face an opponent of Eric's choosing in the ring. If Waltman wins, he gets his suspension lifted and this all ends. If Eric's wrestler wins, Waltman is not only suspended, but he's FIRED from WCW. With one small legal stipulation in the contract. He can not go work for Vince. So he's basically fired and gone from the public eye forever. Sean says that's OK - he'll beat anyone Eric wants him to wrestle. Eric looks around and mentions that in the interview that Waltman did, he called Cyrus a "tool". Well, that's true. Cyrus is Eric's tool. And at the Clash, it's Sean Waltman versus Cyrus. Waltman smiles as he rolls out of the ring. Cyrus doesn't look happy and starts to complain to Eric as we go to commercial.
(commercial)
We come back and go immediately to David Penzer as it's time for the main event.
WCW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
JEFF JARRETT (c) versus SEAN O'HAIRE
Jarrett and O'Haire both start off fast paced as we see a quick exchange of holds and counters. Schiavone comments on how it's strange that no Horsemen have accompanied O'Haire to the ring. Mantell mentions that you know they're all watching backstage. A quick flurry of moves as O'Haire gets several two counts on Jarrett. Only Jarrett's quick thinking allows him to escape before the three counts. O'Haire has Jarrett locked in a chinlock as Jarrett backs him into the corner. As the referee signals for the break, Jarrett uses a backwards kick to catch O'Haire low. Sean goes down as Jarrett proclaims his innocence to the referee. Punches and a big DDT by Jarrett. He covers and gets two as Sean barely manages to get a foot on the ropes. Jarrett is incensed as he picks up Sean and goes to whip him across the ring. Sean reverses and Jarrett goes crashing into the referee who was in the way. The referee goes down and Jarrett, seeing this, blatantly kicks OHaire with a low blow. Jeff covers, but there is no referee. Jarrett is up and goes for his guitar in the corner. Just as Jarrett is ready to bring the guitar crashing down on O'Haire's head, here is Arn Anderson in the ring. He levels Jarrett with a picture-perfect spinebuster. Arn goes to get the referee as O'Haire climbs the ropes and flies with a swanton from the top. O'Haire covers as Arn tosses the referee into position. The referee counts three and we have a new World Champion.
Winner and NEW WCW WORLD CHAMPION - SEAN O'HAIRE...
Here come the Horsemen to the ring and they celebrate with Sean on the outside of the ring as we see Jarrett pulling himself up in the ring and reality sinking in as he realizes he's not the Champ anymore. O'Haire holds the belt up for the fans as we fade to black...
THE END....
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